If you are reading this, then you already know that pregnant chicks are very sensitive! Very Sensitive! Any many of us worry too much about pregnancy and baby related things that in the end will all work out just fine. We panic over little things and worry about "one in a million" types of scenarios happening during child birth... We have friends who tell us insane stories about their friend who gave birth in the hallway at home because they couldn't make it to the hospital in time... Probably a true story but the odds are soooo small! Yet we hear the story and we worry! We look things up online and read horror stories and we worry!
Here are just two of the things you should never ever tell a pregnant woman:
NEVER TELL A PREGNANT WOMAN THAT SHE IS BIG, HUGE, OR THAT SHE MUST BE CARRYING A BIG BABY... She will dwell on it forever and you will make her so upset! During my first pregnancy, the thing I hated hearing the most from people (usually women of my parent's generation) was "Oh Honey, are you sure you're only seven months pregnant? You are carrying so low... you are so big! You poor thing!" I was pretty big! I gained about 50 pounds with my first daughter. I wasn't great with my eating and hadn't discovered yet how badly sodium affects my body, causing me to retain ridiculous amounts of water. We ate restaurant food all the time. I was huge! All parts of my body were HUGE! My face was HUGE! My ankles were as big as my thighs (well close)... Every part of my body was HUGE! It was out of control! At any rate, I hated when people would tell me how big I was... I would spend the next hour worrying that I was too big and never going to lose the weight. I spent many doctor visits asking if they were sure I was okay - should they test me again for gestational diabetes? They would tell me I was fine and that some people just gain more weight when pregnant. Nevertheless I worried about it, and I worried about it because people felt the need to say something to me about it! It is hard being pregnant - especially toward the end when you can't see your feet, can barely shave your legs, and have trouble putting on your undies and pants!
NEVER TELL A PREGNANT WOMAN THAT SHE IS SMALL, TINY, SKINNY, ETC.... She will dwell on it forever and you will make her just about as upset as if you told her she was huge.... When I have had the baby and its three months later and I am struggling to lose the baby weight, that is the only appropriate time during my prenatal and new baby time that it is okay to say I am skinny or tiny or thin! During this pregnancy, I have gained an appropriate amount of weight. With 6 weeks to go, I have only gained 25 pounds and I am proud of that! I eat healthy (sans the occasional chocolate or ice cream freakout). We eat at home for almost every meal and I watch my sodium intake like a hawk. I actually look like myself except for the giant basketball of a tummy in the front. Now I may balloon up here in my last month and a half, but for now, I am doing well! My pant size is only about a size up from normal. I am one of those pregnant woman who doesn't look pregnant from the back - just a little wider than usual! I used to hate those pregnant women! At any rate, many woman at work (like five to ten of them) have recently told me how tiny I am! This makes pregnant women panic in the opposite direction... Am I too small? Is the baby growing properly? Is the placenta doing its job? Is something wrong with me or the baby? I almost panic more hearing about how small I am than when they used to tell me how big I was! I know its crazy! Pregnant women are crazy! I told my husband that I was upset about people calling me tiny and he literally thought I was crazy! He said "You are upset because people are saying something nice to you?!?!" He is right! All of these women mean well! But still! I worry/panic that I am too small now! And this is a few days after a doctor visit in which my mid-wife told me I am measuring just perfectly!
So the moral of this little blog tonight is that if you have to say something to a pregnant woman about how she looks, if you just can't contain your inner thoughts about her, just tell her she is adorable, beautiful, cute, etc! That works and adorable is nothing to panic about! We don't need to hear your opinion about our size! We just don't! Who are you to even comment on our size really? Just because you have had a baby or two or three doesn't make you an expert on pregnant women and what size they should be at eight months pregnant!!! If we type "adorable pregnant women" into google, nothing scary will pop up! There will be no horror stories for us to read about! Please just tell us we are cute and cuddly and all will be right with our pregnant little worlds!!!
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